I know it's been a while since I posted. The reason? Well, I'll let you choose from a list, pick whichever excuse makes you feel the best.
1. I just haven't been arsed.
2. I was busy getting probed by aliens. E.T didn't even buy me dinner first but ALF what a lover! That nose, so many uses!
3. I am Steve Jobs and therefore died recently, but now I'm back because I invented a cure for dying.
4. The dog ate me and then vomited me back up in perfect human form a few months later.
5. I just haven't been arsed.
So now that I'm back in the Blogosphere I decided to have a look at who you, the reader are. With the help of Google Analytics I was able to see what key words people are typing into google that leads them to my blog. The results are interesting. The words you use to find me are as follows:
- Vegetable fucking
- Happy old woman
- Weird gay guys
- Older bbw big boobs
- Fat woman exercising
- Gay fucker
I don't know what "bbw" stands for, can any of you perverts shed some light on that?
I'm glad there's someone out there who wants to read about a "happy old woman". However, it's still an unusual thing to google and something tells me your next sentence went something like "just before she gets shot by a gay fucker".
"Fat woman exercising"....? Now that's always going to be hilarious to read and/ or look at. I salute you.